"The Law and Divorce"
Notes
Transcript
We live in a world where marriage is often treated as temporary.
The culture says -
“If you're not happy, leave.”
“You deserve to be happy.”
“You can always start over.”
“Marriage is just a piece of paper.”
“If the relationship isn't working, get out.”
But Jesus doesn't approach marriage from the standpoint of convenience. Rather, Jesus approaches marriage from the standpoint of God's design.
In our text Jesus has been and continues correcting the Pharisees' shallow understanding of righteousness.
In verses 21–26, He addressed murder and anger.
In verses 27–30, He addressed adultery and lust.
Now, in verses 31–32, He addresses divorce and marriage.
The progression is important:
Anger → Murder
Lust → Adultery
Divorce → The breaking of a covenant
Jesus is teaching that God's standard of righteousness reaches beyond outward actions. It reaches into the heart and into our understanding of God's institution of marriage.
Christian traditions have interpreted these passages differently.
The Roman Catholic Church historically denied divorce entirely,
Eastern Orthodox Church permits divorce and remarriage for adultery and other grave offenses, viewing such breaches as destroying the marital bond itself.
Evangelical Protestants typically recognize adultery and desertion by an unbeliever as grounds for divorce,
Conservative Protestants hold nearly every conceivable position—from permitting neither divorce nor remarriage, to allowing divorce for adultery with remarriage permitted only for the innocent party, to recognizing additional grounds like abuse or fundamental covenant breach.
The biblical witness establishes divorce as contrary to God’s original intention while acknowledging human brokenness.
Contemporary evangelical scholarship emphasizes “a strong presumption against divorce” while recognizing that covenant infidelity in forms like adultery, desertion, and abuse may constitute legitimate grounds
31 “It was said, ‘Whoever sends his wife away, let him give her a certificate of divorce’; 32 but I say to you that everyone who divorces his wife, except for the reason of unchastity, makes her commit adultery; and whoever marries a divorced woman commits adultery.
In Matthew 5:31-32 Jesus confronts the nonchalant attitude towards divorce and calls His people to honor God's design for marriage.
Proposition - Because marriage is God's covenant and not man's convenience, believers are called to honor the sanctity, permanence, and purity of marriage.
Interrogative question - What practices can we implement to ensure our marriages reflect the covenant relationship described in scripture?
1. God’s Design for Marriage -
1. God’s Design for Marriage -
31 “It was said, ‘Whoever sends his wife away, let him give her a certificate of divorce’; 32 but I say to you that everyone who divorces his wife, except for the reason of unchastity, makes her commit adultery; and whoever marries a divorced woman commits adultery.
Before we can properly understand Matthew 5:31–32, we must remind ourselves what we learn in the book of Genesis.
18 Then the Lord God said, “It is not good for the man to be alone; I will make him a helper suitable for him.”
God created marriage -
Marriage wasn't invented by the government -
Marriage wasn't invented by culture -
Marriage wasn't invented by Hollywood -
Marriage was God's idea, and God’s idea only -
24 For this reason a man shall leave his father and his mother, and be joined to his wife; and they shall become one flesh.
Take note of the three things mentioned in this verse -
1. Leaving -
A man leaves his father and mother.
2. Cleaving -
He is joined to his wife.
3. Becoming one -
They become one flesh.
Marriage is far more than a legal contract. On the contrary it is a God-ordained covenant relationship.
Turn to Matthew chapter 19 - In the context of this chapter the Pharisees specifically question Jesus about divorce.
Jesus answers them in verse 4 - “Have you not read that He who created them from the beginning made them male and female…”
Then He quotes Genesis 2:24.
And Jesus summarizes what He is saying in verses 6 - “What therefore God has joined together, let no man separate.”
—Matthew 19:6
Illustration: A Building Foundation
Imagine building a house.
You can change the curtains.
You can repaint the walls.
You can replace the furniture.
But you cannot casually remove the foundation and expect the house to remain standing.
Marriage has a foundation established by God.
The problem with modern culture is that people often treat marriage like furniture rather than a foundation.
If they don't like it, they replace it.
But Jesus says marriage is something God joins together.
2. The Historical Reaction to Marriage -
2. The Historical Reaction to Marriage -
31 “It was said, ‘Whoever sends his wife away, let him give her a certificate of divorce’;
Jesus is drawing the religious leaders attention to Deuteronomy 24:1–4
1 “When a man takes a wife and marries her, and it happens that she finds no favor in his eyes because he has found some indecency in her, and he writes her a certificate of divorce and puts it in her hand and sends her out from his house, 2 and she leaves his house and goes and becomes another man’s wife, 3 and if the latter husband turns against her and writes her a certificate of divorce and puts it in her hand and sends her out of his house, or if the latter husband dies who took her to be his wife, 4 then her former husband who sent her away is not allowed to take her again to be his wife, since she has been defiled; for that is an abomination before the Lord, and you shall not bring sin on the land which the Lord your God gives you as an inheritance.
The problem was not that Moses commanded people to divorce.
The passage dealt with what happened when divorce occurred and regulated the situation.
1 “When a man takes a wife and marries her, and it happens that she finds no favor in his eyes because he has found some indecency in her, and he writes her a certificate of divorce and puts it in her hand and sends her out from his house,
It describes a man finding “some indecency” in his wife and giving her a certificate of divorce.
By Jesus' day, there was significant debate among Jewish teachers concerning what qualified as legitimate grounds for divorce.
Two influential rabbinic schools are often discussed:
By the time of Jesus, Jewish teachers were debating the meaning of Deuteronomy 24:1, particularly the phrase translated “some indecency” or “some uncleanness.”
There are two schools of thoughts with opposing interpretations -
The School of Shammai -
Shammai represented the more restrictive interpretation.
The school understood the passage as referring to serious sexual misconduct. Historical Jewish sources associate the Shammaite interpretation with sexual immorality as the legitimate ground for divorce.
The School of Hillel -
Hillel represented a much broader interpretation.
The Hillelite interpretation allowed divorce for a wide range of reasons, including relatively minor offenses. Josephus and Philo also describe divorce in terms that reflect a broad understanding of a husband's ability to divorce his wife.
The Mishnah later records the famous debate between the schools.
By the first century, divorce could therefore be discussed as though it were a man's right to dismiss his wife.
This is the mentality that Our Lord confronts.
The Pharisees were interested in:
“What are the legal grounds for getting out?”
Jesus once again turns the table and brings it to the heart -
“What did God intend marriage to be?”
3. Jesus Exposes the Selfishness behind a “casual” divorce -
3. Jesus Exposes the Selfishness behind a “casual” divorce -
32 but I say to you that everyone who divorces his wife, except for the reason of unchastity, makes her commit adultery; and whoever marries a divorced woman commits adultery.
That phrase is important.
Jesus isn't merely giving another rabbinical opinion.
Jesus speaks with divine authority.
He is exposing the heart behind the practice.
The issue wasn't merely the certificate.
A man could say:
“I followed the legal procedure.”
But Jesus says:
You can follow the procedure and still violate God's moral law.
This is exactly what Jesus has been teaching throughout Matthew 5.
The Pharisees were focused on outward behavior.
Jesus is focused on the heart.
21 “You have heard that the ancients were told, ‘You shall not commit murder’ and ‘Whoever commits murder shall be liable to the court.’ 22 “But I say to you that everyone who is angry with his brother shall be guilty before the court; and whoever says to his brother, ‘You good-for-nothing,’ shall be guilty before the supreme court; and whoever says, ‘You fool,’ shall be guilty enough to go into the fiery hell.
They said:
“You shall not commit murder.”
Jesus says anger matters.
27 “You have heard that it was said, ‘You shall not commit adultery’; 28 but I say to you that everyone who looks at a woman with lust for her has already committed adultery with her in his heart.
They said:
“You shall not commit adultery.”
Jesus says lust matters.
31 “It was said, ‘Whoever sends his wife away, let him give her a certificate of divorce’; 32 but I say to you that everyone who divorces his wife, except for the reason of unchastity, makes her commit adultery; and whoever marries a divorced woman commits adultery.
They were discussing divorce.
Jesus says:
Your attitude toward marriage matters.
4. Divorce is not part of God’s Plan -
4. Divorce is not part of God’s Plan -
We need to be careful here.
The Bible does not teach that every divorce is identical.
It does not teach that every situation has the same moral circumstances.
But it does clearly teach that divorce was not God's original design for marriage.
16 “For I hate divorce,” says the Lord, the God of Israel, “and him who covers his garment with wrong,” says the Lord of hosts. “So take heed to your spirit, that you do not deal treacherously.”
The context is important.
God was rebuking men who were dealing treacherously with their wives.
Divorce was not being presented as God's preferred solution.
Jesus says the same thing in Matthew 19:8
8 He said to them, “Because of your hardness of heart Moses permitted you to divorce your wives; but from the beginning it has not been this way.
Notice the phrase:
“From the beginning.”
Jesus takes us back to Genesis.
God's original design was one man and one woman united in a lifelong covenant.
Divorce entered the human experience because of sin and hardness of heart.
Take your Bibles and turn to Ezra chapter 10 -
5. The “Exceptions” for divorce -
5. The “Exceptions” for divorce -
32 but I say to you that everyone who divorces his wife, except for the reason of unchastity, makes her commit adultery; and whoever marries a divorced woman commits adultery.
The Greek term translated “unchastity” is porneia.
It refers broadly to sexual immorality.
Jesus therefore identifies sexual immorality as a legitimate exception in His teaching on divorce.
Matthew 19:9 contains the parallel teaching -
This doesn't make divorce the goal.
It recognizes the devastating reality of sexual sin within the marriage covenant.
Another important passage: 1 Corinthians 7
Paul also addresses abandonment by an unbelieving spouse.
1 Corinthians 7:15
“Yet if the unbelieving one leaves, let him leave; the brother or the sister is not under bondage in such cases…”
So Scripture recognizes circumstances involving:
Sexual immorality
Abandonment by an unbelieving spouse
These passages must be handled carefully rather than used as loopholes.
The Bible's emphasis remains:
Marriage is to be honored and protected.
6. Jesus Prioritizes Marriage -
6. Jesus Prioritizes Marriage -
32 but I say to you that everyone who divorces his wife, except for the reason of unchastity, makes her commit adultery; and whoever marries a divorced woman commits adultery.
This statement must be understood within the social and legal world of first-century Judaism.
A woman who was divorced could be placed in an extremely difficult social and economic position.
Jesus isn't blaming the innocent victim of someone else's sin.
He is exposing the seriousness of the husband's wrongful action.
A man couldn't simply say:
“She's no longer my wife, so I have no responsibility.”
Jesus says the covenant relationship matters before God.
7. Marriage is a Picture of Christ and the Church -
7. Marriage is a Picture of Christ and the Church -
One of the most beautiful truths about marriage appears in Ephesians 5.
25 Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ also loved the church and gave Himself up for her,
Marriage points beyond itself.
A Christian marriage should provide the world with a picture of:
Christ's sacrificial love for His church.
31 For this reason a man shall leave his father and mother and shall be joined to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh. 32 This mystery is great; but I am speaking with reference to Christ and the church.
Think about that.
Marriage isn't merely about two people.
Marriage is theological.
It communicates something about God's covenant faithfulness.
Encouragement to those who have experienced a divorce -
This passage must never be used as a weapon against people who have experienced the pain of divorce.
Some people have sinned in marriage.
Some have been sinned against.
Some have experienced abandonment.
Some have experienced sexual unfaithfulness.
Some were divorced before they understood the biblical teaching on marriage.
Whatever someone's past, the answer ought never to be shame without hope.
The gospel offers forgiveness and restoration.
9 If we confess our sins, He is faithful and righteous to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness.
The church should uphold God's standard of marriage while also extending the grace of Christ to broken, and royally messed up people.
Truth without grace becomes harshness.
Grace without truth becomes compromise.
Jesus gives us both truth and grace.
SO WHAT?
Marriage is a God-ordained covenant -
The world says:
“Marriage is about what you can get.”
Jesus says:
Marriage is about faithfulness -
The world says:
“Leave when things become difficult.”
Jesus says:
Honor what God has joined together -
The world says:
“Follow your heart.”
Jesus says:
Guard your heart -
And the gospel reminds us that we can't live God's design faithfully apart from God's grace.
If you're married -
Honor your marriage.
If you're preparing for marriage -
Take marriage seriously.
If you're dating -
Don't practice behaviors that belong inside the covenant of marriage.
If your marriage is struggling -
Seek biblical help before the crisis becomes a catastrophe.
If you've experienced divorce -
Don't run from Christ because of your past. Run to Christ because of your need for grace.
Remember brothers and sisters in Christ -
Your faithfulness in marriage should point people toward the faithfulness of Christ.
Christ doesn't abandon His church.
Christ doesn't casually discard His people.
Christ loves His bride sacrificially.
And that is the standard toward which Christian marriage should continually point.
How can we better reflect God's design for marriage in our daily lives?
In what ways can prayer strengthen the covenant we have in our marriages?
What does it mean for you personally to honor the sanctity and permanence of marriage?
How can scripture guide us in addressing challenges in our marriages?
What role does forgiveness play in maintaining a healthy marriage?
What practical steps can you take this week to improve communication with your spouse?
How can you actively demonstrate commitment to your marriage in a culture that devalues it?
What boundaries might you establish to protect your marriage from external influences?
How can you involve your community or church in supporting your marriage?
What resources, such as books or counseling, can you explore to strengthen your marriage?
“What therefore God has joined together, let no man separate.”
—Matthew 19:6
